Final Installment of a Three Part Blog Series
The awakening of my Spirit became a deep awareness within my soul. This awareness became a beam of light as I proceeded through the chapters of Carolyn Myss’s book,” Entering the Castle.” The “castle” is symbolic for your soul with each “room” representing different integrated parts of yourself that make up the soul. Up to now my soul was a restless wanderer searching for direction in my life. But now with this book I had a roadmap, a compass which directed me to where I needed to go. And where I needed to go was deep within “the castle” to enter each “room” to meet the many “me’s” that were my soul.
The True Self and the False Self
As each exercise of the book “Entering the Castle” unfolded I noticed a shift within me. This shift was an awareness that was coming from my awakening from the dark night of my soul. The dark night of the soul is a spiritual struggle of wrestling with suffering and grief that reveals disconnect with Spirit.
As I entered each “room” within my “castle” my True Self and my False Self met together. My False Self was a disconnection from the soul I came into this world with and from my True Relationship with God or Spirit. My True Self is the connection to the soul I came into this world that holds a powerful yet intimate True Relationship with God or Spirit.
As we grow into life, we are unconsciously directed into living in an external world of others expectations and religious dogma. This comes from an unconscious preconditioning that happens to all of us related to our upbringing, our environments, and our relationships. We are all part of generations of passed on belief and value systems that we continue to pass on. The False Self brings lack of self identity and suffering into our lives.
As I met my False Self I saw where so much of my suffering and grief was rising from. I had to muster up the courage each day to meet and greet each part of my False Self and be open to who and what I met. Was it difficult? Yes for its not easy to also see how often you had unconsciously created the situations that left such bleeding wounds within yourself. It’s easier to blame someone or event for our suffering and losses in life because that is territory we are familiar with. It was not easy to stick with the exercises in the book when I had to face the ugly parts of my life and my False Self.
But then I met my True Self. It was Love in a way I never felt before. Love and Light pouring in from God as I saw what reconnecting with my soul would bring. When I realized this each “room” of my “castle” became safer and safer to enter into. Each room within my castle held the answer to a particular question or why in my life. Each room held a lesson that was or still needed to be learned.
That is why the False Self and the True Self meet together in these “rooms” to learn from one another in order to become whole again. Eventually each “room” became a healing journey with a Guiding Light that grew brighter on my path to reconnecting with my True Self. Now I was able to see and connect with the peaceful healing Love of God, of Spirit.
I began to feel energy slowly creep back into my body. I was able to be up for longer periods of time. I began putting together a spiritually based business and career, but not sure how or what it should be. This is when the teacher reveals itself to the student or what others may call synchronicity.
I was following a business coach at the time who presented two gentlemen named Donny Lobree and Kirk Prine from The Missing Thread to Abundance (www.themissingthread.com) on one of this business coache’s group calls. What was interesting about this call was it was about how the body becomes ill from years of accumulated pain and grief.
Before this call I had become fascinated by the mind body link to illness and again through a book by Carolyn Myss called,” Anatomy of the Spirit, The Seven Stages of Power and Healing.” My teachers had appeared. And within two weeks I was on a plane to San Francisco to meet Donny and Kirk for a weekend that changed my life forever.
Discovering My Life Purpose
It was on this weekend I learned of how accumulated life experiences and crisis actually attached themselves within our bodies down to the cellular level. Our cells actually change due to the stress we put on our bodies. This is when it becomes a “body story” which becomes stuck on replay that causes us to become sick physically, emotionally and spiritually. Under the sage and skilled guidance of Donny and Kirk, I released key body stories that I had kept suppressed since childhood. I was given the tools to continue my Body Story work at home.
With additional personal coaching from Donny and Kirk, my mind and spirit shifted and I began to grow in strength, endurance and most of all Energy! A healing process had begun, but also another process had begun. I was discovering my Life Purpose. Within a year I was back in San Francisco with Donny and Kirk where I was trained and certified in being a Body Story™ Expert and becoming a Reiki Master/Teacher.
We finally get to where Reiki and Fibromyalgia became the Gift on My Healing Journey and my life. As I practiced Reiki on others and myself, I noticed that the Reiki was leading me on a deeper spiritual path. It was more then bringing the gentle laying of hands that bring peace and balance to the body; it was an actual living breathing personal spiritual practice for me.
Reiki awakened in me the awareness of Who My True Self was, the WHO I AM, instead of the What I Am that I used to be. Through Reiki I reconnected with my soul and God on levels of joy and love that still astound me every day. Each day my personal Reiki spiritual practice expands as I grow in Spirit. I can see, feel and understand the world and its inhabitants in love and as One. I recently heard Deepak Chopra say,” Our Gifts lay close to our wounds.”
This Is What I Learned
And this is what I have learned. That without the corporate firing, without the long road of being diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue/Fibromyalgia I would not be the person I am today. It was my wake up call to my Life Purpose. Yes I still have bad days and I have learned that boundaries to protect my health are good, not selfish regardless of what others may think. Its none of my business what others think of me.
Regardless I continue to grow in wisdom and love through my daily spiritual practice of self Reiki and bringing Reiki to others. For me it’s my life and every day it expands Who I Am, not What I Am. I am not my Fibromyalgia; it is a condition within my body.
However I am grateful for the Fibromyalgia for what it has taught me and the path it put me on. When a life crisis hits we can determine its outcome by the attitude we bring to it and not allow ourselves to be defined by it. This is what I learned on my Healing Journey with Fibromyalgia and Reiki and that is why it is a Gift.
“A Journey of Faith and Healing”
to read additional articles posted by Mary Jane Brigger on career, faith, spirituality and healing.
Mary Jane Brigger
Mary Jane is a Reiki Master/Teacher who brings compassionate Reiki healing energy to people whose lives are frozen in grief from transitions brought on by life crisis, illness, or death. Mary Jane’s clients describe her channeled healing energy as “peaceful” as they re-awaken to their True Self and connect back to their bodies in balance and harmony.
Mary Jane is founder and owner of Soul Care Experience which provides healing services for people and their pets with Reiki and The The Body Story ™ Experience.. She is a Reiki Master/Teacher and Body Story™ Expert on the faculty of The Missing Thread Mystery School in San Francisco, CA. Mary Jane is a Midwife to the Dying for both people and animals and volunteers locally providing Reiki to hospice patients and their families.
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